Smokers Guide to Being the Best Possible of Smokers.

*I did not come up with these.

1. Give your last cigar away occasionally. It will make you feel better.

2. Do not light a cigar in the presence of a respected friend or acquaintance, unless you give him one. This does not apply to employees, fellow boarders or anyone with whom you come in daily contact.

3. Never refuse a light to any smoker. If you haven’t a match to give him, let him borrow some of your fire, even if it spoils your cigar.

4. Remember that smokers are equal when smoking.

5. Do keep a fresh pipe – if he is a pipe smoker – for your friend.

6. Do the nice thing once in a while. If you have more than one cigar and notice a man looking sadly out of the smoking car window, proffer him one of your smokes, with the understanding that there have been times when you were short on smokes and long on loneliness yourself.

7. Give your friend your best cigar. You’ll have lots of fine future smokes coming to you if you do.

8. Remember you can display more brotherly feeling in the way you proffer a cigar than in a world of nice words and small loans.

9. Remember that the hospitable smoker is one of nature’s choicest creations.

10. Never play a joke on a smoker. Don’t give the meanest of them a loaded cigar. It’s brutal, dangerous and a stupid thing to do.

11. Don’t be a cigar or cigarette “sponge”. It’s a low down habit. You can lose your self-respect and the respect of your friends more in this way than any other.

12. Don’t be a strutting, nose-tilting smoker. It’s tough.

13. Never smoke in the presence of ladies, unless you know it is not offensive. If you don’t know, ask them. If they object, don’t smoke. In spite of Kipling, any good woman is far finer of which any cigar has ever dreamed.

14. “Life is too short for poor food, poor company, poor clothes” and poor smokes.

15. Remember that silence and a good cigar are two of the finest things on earth. Even a hermit can be an angel under these circumstances, and a man of the world a man of the other world. Puff your smoke heavenward, and pitch your thoughts toward the clouds.


RespectMyAuthorita said...

Smoking sucks. Waste of time and money, and it annoys all the people who dont smoke. Think about it, its unbiblical, right. doesnt it say something about smoke to the eyes, in reference to something bad? Smoke is something we dont want around!

RespectMyAuthorita said...

Smoking isnt mentioned by name in the bible, so I dont think we can ever classify it as wrong or a sin. Neither side of this arguement has factual evidence for a moral rule. But what is a fact in our society is that smoking is viewed by christians and nonchristians as a rebellious action, maybe not viewed as sinful, but very rebellious. Now this is the only arguement in my mind that carries water. Non christians view christians that smoke as hypocrites or "bad christians" or whatever you wanna call it. Why? because they equate smoking with cussing,drugs,porn, etc and not in that order. This is a fact. You have no idea how many times i have had people ask me when they find out i went to christ church, if they smoke or allow smoking there. I say yes, and their eyes open wider than you will believe. These are non christians! they think that smokers calling themselves christians is rediculous. Now, this doesnt mean smokers are in sin, nor does it mean you are incorrect for how you view it. Clearly the misguided view is in the nonchristian. They are thinking smoking and christianity are opposites. this is clearly incorrect. But, the arguement is here. Who cares if they are incorrect! Should christians do something that hurts their witness even if its not wrong? no they shouldnt. They wont be in sin if they choose to smoke,because there is nothing wrong with smoking. But if you are willing to sacrifice your witness for a cigar, then that says something about you. Now there are several ways to fight this arguement i just made. 1) me choosing not to smoke wont stop how non christians view these people, because all the others will still smoke... Well i would say if you could avoid even negatively impacting 1 soul by quitting would it be worth it? 2)you might just reject entirely that it is a negative witness, and if you do this you are a retard, because clearly you dont talk to enough nonchristians outside your circle that view it that way and i have. 3)you might say you could speak with these non christians and explain to them "what is what" and they would be fine then. (and they probably would ill agree). But its simply something someone sees and in passing solidifies in their mind what they think of christians and most of the time you may or may not get the chance to have that conversation.

There are a bunch of arguements on why smoking is bad, unhealthy, not courteous to 2nd handers, and the list goes on.and all these can be shot down easily with rhetoric. But they are legitimate feelings others have against it. And there is only 1 reason to smoke, "you like it". And hey its a free country and its not a sin, but if you looked at a pro con list, where is the wisdom in choosing to smoke?

RespectMyAuthorita said...

Look at it this way, Coke is a great product that i love. If my wife thought it was unhealthy,waste of money,somehow (for sake of analogy) it smells bad, is a poor witness etc.. for me to drink coke and she asked me to quit, i would. There is nothing sinful about coke, and nothing wrong with me drinking it, and i love it. But if the irrational feelings my wife has towards me drinking them are great in number, rather than trying to talk my way out of it and convince her she is wrong, or a million other people who feel the same way, Ill just give up 1 thing in my life i love and enjoy a million other blessings. In my mind, being a Man is sacrificing something even when you dont view the other parties reasons are legit. But giving it up because you have balls and you dont have to have your way, you can find something to replace it with, like cranraspberry juice. Making a big deal and arguing your point out of things like that isnt steve, its stew. If someone said steve could you not smoke its rude annoying and unhealthy, he would be like sure whatever put out the cigar and start making out with a chick. stew would start making logical arguemnents on why there is nothing wrong biblically or practically with smoking and he would go home without a hot chick riding bitch on his harley because he rides a huffy and wears a fannypack full of cigars.

Evan Gunn said...

Jason, so because one pagan thinks I am a hypocrite for claiming christianity and smoking then I have lost all ability to witness to that person? One of my Granfathers first ministry here in moscow was "Gods Garage". It was a place where adolescents could go and smoke indoors. That was what they did as a ministry by making friends with these kids who typically thought that christians were all up tight. What they did was opening a christian facility and saying, "Hey you smokers, we don't think you are bad for smoking; just for other reasons."

By the way, unless I have missed something in the world I think it is spelled Stu, as in Stuart.

It is a good thing Jason that your wife supports people who drink coke. My mom use to be a person who believed that smoking was a sin because "your body is the temple". Before they were dating my dad was going to light up a cigar in front of my mom. They quickly debated after my dad had looked at the direct passage. She went home that night, woke up the next morning and said, "I am going to marry Evan Wilson".

That is for those who think it is a sin. But for those who don't like the smell, you are being over-dramatic.Harden up.

to conclude I will break it down as so. It is easy to tell a non-believer that it says nowhere in the bible that smoking is bad, rather than getting your non-believers to stop smoking and join the church.

And I am not suggesting that everyone should smoke, but saying that smoking is not something we want around is silly. Try telling that to the large number of people in this world who do smoke.


Evan Gunn said...

I just remembered, did you even read the blog? We smokers can be nice to non-smokers. It is not as if every time we light up we intentionally blow smoke in your face. Read these jason, they were in the blog.

2. Do not light a cigar in the presence of a respected friend or acquaintance, unless you give him one. This does not apply to employees, fellow boarders or anyone with whom you come in daily contact.

13. Never smoke in the presence of ladies, unless you know it is not offensive. If you don’t know, ask them. If they object, don’t smoke. In spite of Kipling, any good woman is far finer of which any cigar has ever dreamed.