"Lest We Forget" Truth

Farther, and farther I am stretching and hurting my brain, hoping that my hand will begin to write subconsciously. I have obtained probable cause that I have gone insane since I have attempted this method more than once; each time thinking in my head, "This could be it! I might discover myself and all of my potential!" Who else am I kidding but myself? I am so plainly and obviously not of that kind, to write spur of the moment some master piece after having played an hour long game of tonsil hockey with the muse of literature. How unqualified I am that I do not even know her name! In short, all that I am is a middle class citizen, with a desire for knowledge, falling short of obtaining most of it. I really have no right to be great in any sense of the term. "Oh, but I have written a poem with my heart!" Says I.

Verily, unto say,
I've begotten a miserly play!

Quick, ask me why I think Shakespeare is good. "Because", I continue, "He wrote with his soul." As if William Shakespeare's soul was prone to produce good things. Shakespeare was a genius of poetry just as engineers are geniuses in mathematics. He knew exactly how to write, and did not treat each of his works as if it were his only child. I would consider Shakespeare having sold out when he wrote A Midsummer Nights Dream. Though I am sure he took pride in his plays, but after some time he could not have been proud of Titus Andronicus.

'I'll speak no more but "Vengeance rot you all!"'

So, what did Shakespeare do at which I failed myself? Was it his ambition that made him succeed? But "noble" Evan Gunn says, "I am ambitious, and see where that has gotten me." Shakespeare knew his equations just as Pascal knew his, and I sit here suggesting that I am allowed to write whatever I want. Well, I suppose freedom of the will would grant me that privilege, but I dare not say that my jumbled mess of words qualify as literature, or God forbid good literature.

So what have I left myself with? I cannot write well because I have not learned the appropriate equations. What have I left the rest of the world with? The objective truth (that is objectivism) has slowly crept its way to reside as an elephant in the corner of the room that is my brain. It sits there not saying anything while making uncomfortable faces that by themselves cannot be ignored. It would be a sorry sight to have the elephant start speaking out to the world to remind it of the fallacies it makes. Oh, the heartbreak the world would have to choose between classical music and rap music for which one is better. If that day comes there will be much weeping and gnashing of teeth. Luckily, this elephant is soft spoken, but it is still an elephant.

What has relativism done for me personally? It has given me countless open doors that could potentially lead to success. What does it take away? It removes my understanding of art and proceeds to relieve me of my claim to knowing greatness or ever knowing what greatness is. If art is relative it turns its followers into idle bohemians afraid of truth. Being told that your poem was undoubtedly, poorly written is such a painful experience; and so rather we claim no absolute truth about poetry, which frees us up to stand pigeon toed at a precipice shouting in tones of weasely ignorance that our poem was good. Soon after our misguided declarations we fail to search for that which really is absolutely true, because Heaven forbid we make anyone (me) feel bad. We will only continue to dig ourselves deeper into ruts of the mind only creating tripe at the bottom since we have made no effort to improve. "But this is my signature writing style, that no one should change." I say while stamping my foot and pointing my pudgy finger at the accuser. This is childish thinking spurred by a mother or an admiring aunt fawning when you played Heart and Soul. Are you so sure that your style of writing even falls under the definition of poetry/literature? Is this not why we go to school to be taught correct definitions to our world. When a teacher marks you down do you relatively object and say, "I thought it was the right answer!" The world will cut you no slack just because you think you are great.

We must at least reach a definition for all forms of art. As with music I claim that the shreiking tones of howler monkeys is the best form of music, I am almost automatically proven wrong, because of the agreed upon definition of music. Howler monkeys do not agree with the definition. If you think it does you become unable to communicate with others; forcing yourself into musical loneliness.

Have I gone to far yet? You may have ventured on your own train of thought by now and may be realizing the faults you have made in your truth claims. "There is no absolute truth!" says you with an absolute claim of truth. So, there is absolute truth; then where does it come from? Does absolute truth come from the insane? It kind of sounds like the Greek myth of the prophetess Cassandra who was always right but no one would ever listen to her. How do we know that the next homeless person we see shouting that "the end is nigh" isn't right. This may seem a bit shallow, but it is required that the homeless person bring some evidence or proof to the table. That is why we never take a conspiracy theorist seriously. Otherwise it is in our nature to believe that the pattern we have been living will continue on forever and ever, amen. Besides, that would be a most cruel and undesirable existence. why would it be such a way?

On that note, why would we call that cruel in the first place? It so clearly disagrees with any ethical code that any sane person abides with. Though, it cannot be cruel because you said so or even if the majority said so. A majority of Germany agreed with Hitler. It appears that we need an authority to tell us what is virtuous, morally acceptable and ethical. A judgment must be passed for anyone to make claims about ethics or even the small things like beauty, writing or music. I myself would suggest that you go find someone to be your judge or hold yourself as the infallible truth bearer.

Where was I going with this? Oh, I recall that I am not the source of all poetical knowledge. After all I did not invent poetry.

The Golden Saying of Epictetus IX

If a man could be thoroughly penetrated, as he ought, with this thought, that we are all in an especial manner sprung from God, and that God is the Father of men as well as of Gods, full surely he would never conceive aught ignoble or base of himself. Whereas if Caesar were to adopt you, your haughty looks would be intolerable; will you not be elated at knowing that you are the son of God? Now however it is not so with us: but seeing that in our birth these two things are commingled--the body which we share with the animals, and the Reason and Thought which we share with the Gods, many decline towards this unhappy kinship with the dead, few rise to the blessed kinship with the Divine. Since then every one must deal with each thing according to the view which he forms about it, those few who hold that they are born for fidelity, modesty, and unerring sureness in dealing with the things of sense, never conceive aught base or ignoble of themselves: but the multitude the contrary. Why, what am I?--A wretched human creature; with this miserable flesh of mine. Miserable indeed! but you have something better than that paltry flesh of yours. Why then cling to the one, and neglect the other? -Epictetus

How stupid are you? Let me answer for you: Very. The conceit and ignorance even among believers can be quite astonishing when it comes to things to be prideful of. We deal with this when we have too much pride or are so self abasing we refuse to be lifted up. Why would we forget who it was we came from? Who is our kin? The Father. Although we admittedly screw up which is naturally pushing God away from us we may still remember than that God would like to be close with you since he made you.

Why should we trifle over points of connection we have to those of fame and power when we can claim direct points of connection to divinity. If you compare the two side by side we just look like morons.

Why this dwell on this misery, for we are "Miserable indeed!" Who are you to stay sulking in the corner as if God has not given you your very life. Buck up and remember your place, though you deserve less take the gift and use to his glory you knucklehead.

Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, after our likeness; -Genesis 1:26

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, in whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. -Ephesians 4:30

then we who are alive, who are left, shall be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air; and so we shall always be with the Lord. Therefore comfort one another with these words. -Thessalonians 4:17-18

Evan G. Wilson - On Beauty

What is the objectivity of Beauty? That last statement presumes that there is no relative truth to beauty since it is the epitome of irrational thought to suggest that A is also not A.

Moving on, how do we find objective truth to that which is good beauty and not beauty. The power of definition is our bridge to telling others that they are wrong. It has been said before that he who makes the definitions wins the argument.

I have simply brought this up to explore what kind of definitions for beauty people have made for themselves.

-Beauty is that which is aged.
-Beauty is that which is new.
-Beauty is achieved through a concept.
-Beauty is catchy.
-Beauty is anything that makes me sad.
-Beauty is anything that makes me happy.
-Beauty is communism.
-Beauty is capitalism.
-Beauty is man.
-Beauty is nature.
-Beauty is fun.
-Beauty is conventional.
-Beauty is the Ubermensch.

For all to know, none of these are beauty. Try again. Though, I would like people to tell me what their idea of Beauty is. Shoot.

Evan G. Wilson - On Truth

In today's culture. inclusive of the Christians, we have a knack for over using, devaluing and demeaning our words, that once before meant so much. A quick and easy example is the word "awesome". We use it so lightly and frequently; likely as an attempt to make ourselves appear as though we are really that great. Consequently, we aren't that great and we have become posers by the mere suggestion in the usage of the word " awesome". But I am not in writing to make the distinction between the Grand Canyon and yourself. I have sited this despicable and frequent misuse of language so that we may venture to the lesser known (and just as despicable and frequent) misuse of the word "Truth"

You may be thinking right now, "Gunn, are you suggesting that our culture is confusing truth with falsehoods?" No, that is not what I mean to say, though it would be easy to argue. I am in belief that we have forgotten the magnificent definition of truth and the great concept that it is. I find in even our remotely shallow sub-cultures, that when they hear the word "truth" they only think, "not the lie". Although, they are correct to think so, they are only putting truth in their life one small step above a falsehood. Like I had mentioned before they have forgotten it's complete definition. Truth as an idea should be regarded as something so much more significant and grand. I see it as the relationship between God and man. When we admit and repent of our sins we have acknowledged how small and trivial we are compared to God, which is vast beyond our minds. We don't look at Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, as some virtuous pagan that did not say anything we didn't agree with. We know Christ as God and never having wronged his fellow human. With truth it is treated as a virtuous pagan or a collection of truisms.

DISCLAIMER: I do not suggest we start worshiping truth as a god. Besides, why should we worship truth when we already worship the highest truth bearing agent, void of false witness. ". . . .But no pleasure is comparable to the standing upon the vantage ground of truth." How great truth is! It not just the information preferred over the false information; it is the clear and only option that gives no excuse for doubt, for who would suggest that you argue against truth. A man given small and simple truths may become a correcter of the trivial, but the man given ultimate truth becomes a leader and perhaps sage. Those with absolute truth appear as though they were working a mojo or clairvoyance, that he may not be able to explain himself.

We who are short of truth only look as fools, with suggestions of our own realities or preconceived notions. It really is too bad when people are not set out to find absolute truth. It comes down to whatever most convenient reality set before them agrees with their relative truth.

Magnus Est Morte

In honor of my Grandmother, on the day she went to see the Lord.

Fulfill your days, don't tread in fear,
Brace for troubles to come.
Though wisdom grim, be what we hear,
Take it faith, with skip and hum.

That depressive word! construct with fire,
Shall futility be futile itself?
We cannot encase, protect or put higher;
But tangibles put on thy shelf.

Evasion! thy useless and pre-bent tips,
We wager zero to many in prolonged fight.
Lay down your soul, forgetting your fits,
What matter thy Condition, so the heart be right.

By Evan Gunn Wilson

Francis Bacon - Of Atheism

I had rather believe all the fables in the Legend, and the Talmud, and the Alcoran, than that this universal frame is without a mind. And therefore, God never wrought miracle, to convince atheism, because his ordinary works convince it. It is true, that a little philosophy inclineth man's mind to atheism; but depth in philosophy bringeth men's minds about to religion. For while the mind of man looketh upon second causes scattered, it may sometimes rest in them, and go no further; but when it beholdeth the chain of them, confederate and linked together, it must needs fly to Providence and Deity. Nay, even that school which is most accused of atheism doth most demonstrate religion; that is, the school of Leucippus and Democritus and Epicurus. For it is a thousand times more credible, that four mutable elements, and one immutable fifth essence, duly and eternally placed, need no God, than that an army of infinite small portions, or seeds unplaced, should have produced this order and beauty, without a divine marshal. The Scripture saith, The fool hath said in his heart, there is no God; it is not said, The fool hath thought in his heart; so as he rather saith it, by rote to himself, as that he would have, than that he can thoroughly believe it, or be persuaded of it. For none deny, there is a God, but those, for whom it maketh that there were no God. It appeareth in nothing more, that atheism is rather in the lip, than in the heart of man, than by this; that atheists will ever be talking of that their opinion, as if they fainted in it, within themselves, and would be glad to be strengthened, by the consent of others. Nay more, you shall have atheists strive to get disciples, as it fareth with other sects. And, which is most of all, you shall have of them, that will suffer for atheism, and not recant; whereas if they did truly think, that there were no such thing as God, why should they trouble themselves? Epicurus is charged, that he did but dissemble for his credit's sake, when he affirmed there were blessed natures, but such as enjoyed themselves, without having respect to the government of the world. Wherein they say he did temporize; though in secret, he thought there was no God. But certainly he is traduced; for his words are noble and divine: Non deos vulgi negare profanum; sed vulgi opiniones diis applicare profanum. Plato could have said no more. And although he had the confidence, to deny the administration, he had not the power, to deny the nature. The Indians of the West, have names for their particular gods, though they have no name for God: as if the heathens should have had the names Jupiter, Apollo, Mars, etc., but not the word Deus; which shows that even those barbarous people have the notion, though they have not the latitude and extent of it. So that against atheists, the very savages take part, with the very subtlest philosophers. The contemplative atheist is rare: a Diagoras, a Bion, a Lucian perhaps, and some others; and yet they seem to be more than they are; for that all that impugn a received religion, or superstition, are by the adverse part branded with the name of atheists. But the great atheists, indeed are hypocrites; which are ever handling holy things, but without feeling; so as they must needs be cauterized in the end. The causes of atheism are: divisions in religion, if they be many; for any one main division, addeth zeal to both sides; but many divisions introduce atheism. Another is, scandal of priests; when it is come to that which St. Bernard saith, non est jam dicere, ut populus sic sacerdos; quia nec sic populus ut sacerdos. A third is, custom of profane scoffing in holy matters; which doth, by little and little, deface the reverence of religion. And lastly, learned times, specially with peace and prosperity; for troubles and adversities do more bow men's minds to religion. They that deny a God, destroy man's nobility; for certainly man is of kin to the beasts, by his body; and, if he be not of kin to God, by his spirit, he is a base and ignoble creature. It destroys likewise magnanimity, and the raising of human nature; for take an example of a dog, and mark what a generosity and courage he will put on, when he finds himself maintained by a man; who to him is instead of a God, or melior natura; which courage is manifestly such, as that creature, without that confidence of a better nature than his own, could never attain. So man, when he resteth and assureth himself, upon divine protection and favor, gathered a force and faith, which human nature in itself could not obtain. Therefore, as atheism is in all respects hateful, so in this, that it depriveth human nature of the means to exalt itself, above human frailty. As it is in particular persons, so it is in nations. Never was there such a state for magnanimity as Rome. Of this state hear what Cicero saith: Quam volumus licet, patres conscripti, nos amemus, tamen nec numero Hispanos, nec robore Gallos, nec calliditate Poenos, nec artibus Graecos, nec denique hoc ipso hujus gentis et terrae domestico nativoque sensu Italos ipsos et Latinos; sed pietate, ad religione, atque hac una sapientia, quod deorum immortalium numine omnia regi gubernarique perspeximus, omnes gentes nationesque superavimus.

The Golden Saying OF Epictetus, VII

What saith Antisthenes? Hast thou never heard?— It is a kingly thing, O Cyrus, to do well and to be evil spoken of. -Epictetus

Therefore we ourselves boast of you in the churches of God for your steadfastness and faith in all your persecutions and in the afflictions which you are enduring. 2 Thes. 1:4

Steadfastness is a very important thing to keep in mind, though it is commonly ignored. The reason being is that in this nation we live, we have inherited kingly lifestyles. Sure, we work hard, but that was inherited from the fall of man. Otherwise, we live very, very comfortably.

Occasionally, we might get into less than desirable positions. Some huge temptations for us is to doubt our faith, or shake our fist at God saying, "I didn't deserve this!" Why do we not think we deserve pain? There is no reason to think this way, and it sprouts from this supposed right to living luxuriously.

This is where Epictetus' stoicism comes in. What he is speaking of is receiving false repute. If you really had good lifestyle then it really should not matter to you what others might say. We will get insecure and act as if there accusations of us were true. It strings back to one of the primary points of stoicism which is contentment. We must be content with our surroundings, because we really don't deserve anything more in the first place. The world does not owe you anything. Be content.

The Straw God Dilemma

So lets say that all Christians do is brown nose some guy who created some things. Ok, I will grant that position. Why do you think that this group of people chose this guy who created some things over say Thomas Edison. Edison created a lot of stuff and then let us use them. Why do you suppose that we would not worship Edison but we would worship some guy who created some things. Maybe it was the things he created. So lets look at the things he created. Well, he made us specifically a tidy little landscape, that has its flaws in weather, but we are generally pleased. He made it at least 6000 years ago. Why are we still worshiping a guy who made some things who is 6000 years past his last invention. Well gee, maybe it was a really good invention. Lets look at it again. He made whole continents, a whole ocean, a whole world, a whole sun, a whole universe. Well I don't know about you but I do not know of anyone else who can do that stuff. So, we worship some guy who made some pretty large things, that nobody else could figure out how to make. Anything else? Yes, but it is kind of weird. Some guy who made some pretty large things also made - me. It gets weirder. I am also told that he made everyone that I know and everyone I don't know. So, we worship a Doctor Frankenstein like man who made my body and some pretty large things.

So, what is he going to do with this stuff? Well, I have a friend who has a friend who says he is this guys son and he tells me that he wants me to worship my his friend and his Father, Dr. Frankenstein impersonator. Well he is very nice for making all this stuff for me but what is he going to do if I don't. I have learned that he will have Chuck Norris roundhouse kick me in the face repeatedly, which is a fate worse than Dante's Inferno. Why Chuck Norris you ask? Well, my friend and his dad (Frankenstein) are good friends with Chuck Norris.

So, now we know what he wants to do with this stuff, but why does he want to do such mean things to everyone? Well, he is a big meany. So he created us so that he can be mean to us. That does not seem very sound, yet, because some Christians tell me that he is mean because he loves us. Well, that sure is bizarre and twisted.

Lets use some logic now. In what circumstance would my supposed creator be mean to me, but still love me. Hmm . . . . . Perhaps we owe him something? I have just received word from a Christian friend that yes we do owe him something. How did this come about? Well I heard that he has a list of ten rules that he tells us to obey, but that was after my ancestors ate of this tree that gives them knowledge of good and evil, to which my creator told them which not to eat. So, I think I understand, because he gave my ancestors one rule to not disobey, but they did anyway. So my ancestors were kicked out of this garden that was perfect, where no work was required of them, into the rest of this world where working really sucks.

So, why should I suffer the same punishment as my ancestor? I didn't eat of the tree. Oh wait it is because I now too have the knowledge of good and evil, and I usually pick evil as a good path for me. But then why is he still threatening me with Chuck Norris' roundhouse kicks if I have already received punishment? Oh yeah, I forgot that there is a distinction from good and evil, and that I typically choose evil. Ok, that seems sound and legitimate.

But wait, there is more. This sounds like a horrible existence that I don't want to be living. I will likely choose evil over good, and I will get roundhouse kicked for it. So, Dr Frakenstein is just not very understanding of how hard it is for me. Dr. Frankenstein then does the craziest thing ever. Remember his son that is friends with my friend? My friend tells me that Frankenstein Jr., we will call him, was a perfect human being. So, what he did was he sacrificed his own son who was supposedly "perfect", which he did so that we did not have to get punished with roundhouse kicks. What!? So then general consensus is that we can sin all we want and not get punished for it, because Frankenstein Jr. was killed, but then soon raised from the dead as a zombie. This is really weird.

So we still get to do evil? I am told no. I am told that Dr. Frankenstein still has expectations of us. He says that if we do evil we will still burn in eternal roundhouse kicks. Then how do I possibly avoid this fate? My friend tells me that all I have to do is be really, really, really sorry. Oh, he just corrected me and said that I must be aware of the evils I have done and ask for forgiveness. And so how am I supposed to know when I did something wrong? Dr. Frankenstein wont tell me how I am wrong; wait, he did tell me. Apparently there is a hand book for the Christians that is long and tedious and dull. And not only that but since we have the knowledge of good and evil written on our hearts, we should know when we are being impious.

Summary: Dr. Frankenstein made some pretty large things, and he made the people that inhabit those large things. Our ancestors broke one rule and now we have to work for everything and pain hurts more than it did before, giving us very exuberant opinions about pain. We suffer the same punishment because we have the knowledge of good and evil, and we usually pick evil thinking it is good for us. But Dr. Frankenstein took perfect little Junior and killed him, which was Junior taking our punishment, instead of us. Dr. Frankenstein still wants us to obey his law, and he will punish us if we don't, and if we don't, we can be aware of it and ask him for forgiveness. Pretty wild.

But when I think about it, Dr. Frankenstein seems to me pretty justified. After all he made this world and I ignored him. He sacrificed his only son (who was perfect) for me and I ignored him. He offers me forgiveness and I ignore him. You know, I think I am looking at this wrong. Dr. Frankenstein, who I learned just now that he lives in the sky, is something that I am having a hard time describing. Oh! He is merciful! I would be very willing to follow a guy who created me and is also very merciful. You know, rather than seeming like a human, he seems more so like a God. A Great God.

You know this is still too weird for me to believe. I am going to go back to hedonism.

THE END.

This definition is pulled from the wiki article of the straw man argument.

A straw man argument is an informal fallacy based on misrepresentation of an opponent's position. To "attack a straw man" is to create the illusion of having refuted a proposition by substituting a superficially similar yet weaker proposition (the "straw man"), and refuting it, without ever having actually refuted the original position.

The straw man fallacy occurs in the following pattern of argument:

1. Person A has position X.
2. Person B disregards certain key points of X and instead presents the superficially-similar position Y. Thus, Y is a resulting distorted version of X and can be set up in several ways, including:
   1. Presenting a misrepresentation of the opponent's position and then refuting it, thus giving the appearance that the opponent's actual position has been refuted.
   2. Quoting an opponent's words out of context – i.e. choosing quotations that misrepresent the opponent's actual intentions
   3. Presenting someone who defends a position poorly as the defender, then refuting that person's arguments – thus giving the appearance that every upholder of that position (and thus the position itself) has been defeated.
   4. Inventing a fictitious persona with actions or beliefs which are then criticized, implying that the person represents a group of whom the speaker is critical.
   5. Oversimplifying an opponent's argument, then attacking this oversimplified version.
3. Person B attacks position Y, concluding that X is false/incorrect/flawed.

This sort of "reasoning" is fallacious, because attacking a distorted version of a position fails to constitute an attack on the actual position.

Atheists that use this argument are not trying to win the argument. They know that Christians are very passionate about their beliefs and so Atheists use this to get a reaction out of Christians. They treat them as if they are fools for believing that a Jewish carpenter is God. And the Christians only encourage it when they get worked up. But the best way to beat the atheist in this situation is to agree with him, about his claim of your own beliefs. He will be caught off guard. And then work your way by suggesting the true things about Christianity to them and slowly building your way to the truth. Then when you find yourself at the actual and a few name changes still in place the atheist will not know what to say because you presented your belief very clearly without getting worked up.

"He who makes the definitions, wins the argument" . . . . . for now.

The Golden Saying OF Epictetus, VI

But what saith God?—"Had it been possible, Epictetus, I would have made both that body of thine and thy possessions free and unimpeded, but as it is, be not deceived:—it is not thine own; it is but finely tempered clay. Since then this I could not do, I have given thee a portion of Myself, in the power of desiring and declining and of pursuing and avoiding, and is a word the power of dealing with the things of sense. And if thou neglect not this, but place all that thou hast therein, thou shalt never be let or hindered; thou shalt never lament; thou shalt not blame or flatter any. What then? Seemeth this to thee a little thing?"—God forbid!—"Be content then therewith!"

And so I pray the Gods. -Epictetus

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
II Cor. 12:10

6 There is great gain in godliness with contentment; 7 for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of the world; 8 but if we have food and clothing, with these we shall be content.
I Tim. 6:6-8

What I see hear is a direct statement telling you that in is a very good and righteous thing before God to be content. But I would like to discuss from where this non-contentment comes. When people find themselves in a less than desirable position, there attitude changes from how they were acting before. When something goes wrong for them they immediately start operating in a pre-supposed belief that they grew up with. Examples of those beliefs would be, American Duties, or Family values. When God tells you to turn the other cheek and American duty tells you to punch the guy in the face, you have not fully given yourself up to God. Same goes for contentment. If you are not content, then you have not fully acknowledged Gods teaching. You are putting our other faiths before God, when we should be seeing the world everyday through the eyes of our primary christian faith. Do not be doubled minded.

18 But some one will say, "You have faith and I have works." Show me your faith apart from your works, and I by my works will show you my faith.
19 You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe -- and shudder.
James 2:18-19

Your faith will only be evident to God if you display your faith with works, and not temporarily replace your christian faith with family values.

Tobacco Parable #2

Mr. John Bain had been sitting in his library for several hours, and had approached the last third of his cigar. Bain was a man who enjoyed each and everyone of his cigars unconditionally, and he always looked forward to the next. Though usually he smoked when he was writing or in a train of thought, Bain could could not latch any topic that night and so he only starred intently at his surroundings.
As soon as he entered the fabled position of mind called "No Thought", the door knob of his abode rattled and proceeded to swing open the door. It was his significantly younger friend, Francis, with a confused face of joy and disbelief. Francis was not Bain's idea of a great friend, but a friend nonetheless. Francis swooped in and greeted Bain saying, "John, I am shocked, but still incredibly happy!" " Why is that?" Said Bain in a Monotone voice. "I proposed to that coffeehouse barista girl, Maria, and she agreed wholeheartedly! I had not given it one thought what I should do if she were to agree; but I don't care Bain! I am a very fortunate man!" Francis was a man of spontaneity. Bain replied, "Well, I suppose fortunate is one way to look at it, Francis, but congratulations either way."
Bain looked down at his cigar and saw that it's life was near ending, and right as the thought occurred to Bain to supply himself another cigar, Francis said, "John, I do know one thing I ought to do tonight: I must smoke a cigar. I was thinking I could relieve you of one of yours, Sir." "Certainly, boy." Bain said, as he rose from his chair to his humidor. He opened the chest, and lifted up the empty top shelf. Bain only saw one cigar left. He had been anticipating two cigars in one night, and paused just looking at his meager stock. Francis tilted his head looking at Bain, curious to know his shadowed thoughts. Bain got over himself and quickly remembered that it would be improper for him to have his last cigar to himself; he knew there would be more in a few days and suppressed his desire. He grabbed the cigar and handed it to the man who "must smoke a cigar." Francis thanked his significantly older friend and Bain welcomed him and said nothing more.
Mr. John Bain was left with no cigar, but who was he to think he had anymore right than the other fellow smoker. This act of self-control put Bain one step closer to being a great smoker.

By Evan Gunn Wilson